Friday, June 30, 2006

Happy Belated Birthday

TO ME! My birthday was yesterday, but if my husband hadn't done something for me, I would have forgotten all about it. Getting older isn't fun anymore, I was done with birthdays after I hit 21. If I can figure out how to put pics from my phone onto here, I'll show ya what he did for me.

So, how old am I? 25! Woo hoo (not really, it sucks).

Every year I do my birthday resolutions. It's always made more sense to me to do resolutions on the birthday then on the beginning of the year. Why it makes sense, I do not know, but I prefer to do my own thing and go against the grain. I know, I am a TOTAL rebel people.

So, here we have it, my resolutions (delusion plans) for this year:

1. Quit drinking diet coke. Seriously, I love the stuff. It is all that I drink. Water? What's water? (I am actually planning on detoxing off of it this weekend, since I have 4 days off for the holiday. Wish me luck)

2. Lose weight. I am what is known as a FAT FLUSHER. This way of living rocks. I can't even begin to tell you how monumental this thing is. I lost freakin' 30 pounds in 3 weeks in April on it. Then I started eating french fries. The pounds decided to come back :-(

3. Pay off all our debts. Lofty plan you say? Well, it so happens I landed the job of a lifetime a couple weeks ago, and with our two incomes combined, we will be debt free in about 8 months. Then, it's all about dumping money into savings and moving on to goal #4!

4. Get myself knocked up. I am so ready people, but we want to be healthier and be more financially secure before we do. Our last pregnancy was so devastating, I don't want to have any fears the next time that it was something I did. I get flack from some people, that, OMG, you are going to be married 3 YEARS before you get pregnant if you follow this plan, you can't wait that long to start a family! To this I say, hey, everyone does things differently. If it were up to me, I would have already had one kid and another one on the way. BUT, my husband feels differently, and as this does require certain things from each of us, I respect that and can wait. I want him to be ready and excited, not stressed and freaked (like last time) Babies are wonderful, but the spouse comes first.

5. Make some awesome blog buddies. I have been lurking for months on blogs, and I'm just now piping up. The bloggers (is it me or does bloggers and blog sound a little, well, lame?) I read are so interesting and funny. I'll have to throw some links up to them. Some of them make me laugh so hard, it is wicked painful.

6. Get a make over. I have never had one, and I want one. I had a friend who worked at a Clinique counter and she helped people change their look all the time. Other then the color of my hair changing, I've pretty much stayed the same. Same make-up base and eyeshadow, same face care, same style of clothes. I almost never even bother with make up anymore, because it's so boring. So, sometime this year I am doing the whole deal, with style. Facial, massage, pedigree, make up revamp and MAJOR shopping spree. Park City outlets, here I come! Of course, all this will happen after I get back to me pre-wedding weight.

7. Learn yoga. Seems like a silly goal, right? Well, it's a hard one for me, because I have this problem with attention spans and keeping still. I just don't know how to shut my brain, or mouth, shut for more then 2 minutes. I have been timed on this. My husband even did this test, where I have to follow a pen with my eyes and focus on things. It's supposed to help you learn to focus better. Yeah, I last 15 seconds. He finally gave up on me. And I have this problem with silence. It's not allowed, I can't stand it. I will talk to myself to fill in silences if I have to. This habit really drives my family batty. My mom, who hates when people say shut up, gets so tired of me, that she will finally say, "Shut up, shut up, please, just SHUT UP!" Even when I write, I write like I talk. Diarrhea of the fingers. So where was I? Oh, right, yoga. I will master being all zen and thoughtful and relaxed this year. Somehow.

8. Fly on a plane without freaking out. Now this goal, delusional. I shouldn't even bother with it, because IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN. I can not handle planes. Irrational fear? Hell no. People, logically PLANES SHOULD NOT FLY. It's not natural, they are huge and heavy. It should not work, but it does. Most of the time. It's that little bit of the time that they don't that bugs me out. It's embarrassing how bad I am with flying. I usually board the plane with tears running down my face. (I just tell people that I just said goodbye to my terminally ill lover for the last time, and they go, ohhhh, you poor thing!) Then, when the plane goes down the runway, the hyperventalating starts and doesn't stop till the plane is safely on the ground again. I could tell you the tons of others things I do on the plane that shows how buggy I am, but seriously, this entry is already freakin' longer then "Gone With the Wind." And THAT my friends, is seriously long.

9. Lay off the gossip columns. I love them, I love the trash and the pictures. Esp. the BAD ones. It is a sickness, it makes my brain rot. Really. And if you want some really good/hilarious celebrity pictures, check out Go Fug Yourself

10. Meet Mike Rowe. BIG DELUSION. Who is Mike Rowe, you ask?! People, I give you Mike Rowe, the man of my dreams (after the hubby of course!)

Brad Pitt? PUh-lease. George Clooney? Not even close. Johnny Depp? Well, ok, I'll give you Johnny Depp. My husband calls Mike Rowe my boyfriend, and he's ok with it. Really ok. But only with him. Because he knows it goes him THEN Mike, and no one else. Ever. Except if Johnny Depp ever decides to fall madly in love with me, then we're going to have problems. Check his show out. Nowhere else will you get a hot guy who is witty, snarky, sarcastic and razor sharp, all while standing in a pile of sh*t.

On that note, I shall end my list of goals for the year. Mike, if you're reading this, sumo.tomorrow.9pm. I'll be waiting ;-)

*Note, bloggers spell check SUCKS. Did you know it doesn't recognize the word blog or blogger. Um, hello!*


At 2:34 PM, Blogger Britt said...

Well, a Happy Late Birthday to you! Good idea to do resolutions for your B-Day! It doesn't work well for me, though, because I was born on New Years Day :)

Your goals look pretty good. I might even try a few myself!!

And don't let people give you crap about being married for three years before you have a baby. Sheesh! I'll have been married for almost four when I have mine. Totally unacceptable for a Utahn, but I guess we're just rebels!

At 12:17 AM, Anonymous Lanna said...

Mike Rowe also did the voice-over narration for "Deadliest Catch" on Discovery. Very nice. :)


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